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Philosopher Stoner 2XS KryptoChronic Unisex Hoodie

KryptoChronic Unisex Hoodie

$58.49 USD
Shipping calculated at checkout.
Step into another realm with the Kryptochronic Hoodie — a full-spectrum visual trip where biotech, flavor, and stoner mythology collide. The front features a neon containment pod cracking open to reveal glowing alien fruit hybrids: oozing raspberries, citrus slice cores, and radioactive nectar dripping in magenta and green.

Above the chamber, “KRYPTOCHRONIC” pulses in glitchy alien text, while the background swirls with psychedelic vapor, circuit fragments, and digital runes. The back continues the transmission — a warp-field of lime green and hot pink smoke trails with glitchy symbols and a dimensional split down the center. This comfy unisex hoodie has a soft outside with a vibrant print and an even softer brushed fleece inside. The hoodie has a relaxed fit, and it’s perfect for wrapping yourself into on a chilly evening.

• 95% recycled polyester, 5% spandex
• Fabric weight (may vary by 5%): 9.08 oz./yd.² (308 g/m²)
• Soft cotton-feel fabric face
• Brushed fleece fabric inside
• Double-lined hood with design on both sides
• Unisex style
• Comes with drawstrings
• Overlock seams
• Blank product components in Mexico sourced from Poland and Mexico
• Blank product components in the EU sourced from China and Poland

Disclaimer: In areas where the fabric is double-layered (like pockets), details from the inner fabric layer may subtly show through, especially with lighter designs.

Size guide

  CHEST (inches) WAIST (inches) HIPS (inches)
2XS 34 ⅝ 28 ⅜ 35 ⅜
XS 36 ¼ 29 ⅞ 37
S 37 ¾ 31 ½ 38 ⅝
M 39 ⅜ 33 ⅛ 40 ⅛
L 42 ½ 36 ¼ 43 ¼
XL 45 ⅝ 39 ⅜ 46 ½
2XL 48 ⅞ 42 ½ 49 ⅝
3XL 52 45 ⅝ 52 ¾
4XL 55 ⅛ 48 ⅞ 55 ⅞
5XL 58 ¼ 52 59
6XL 61 ⅜ 55 ⅛ 62 ¼
  CHEST (cm) WAIST (cm) HIPS (cm)
2XS 88 72 90
XS 92 76 94
S 96 80 98
M 100 84 102
L 108 92 110
XL 116 100 118
2XL 124 108 126
3XL 132 116 134
4XL 140 124 142
5XL 148 132 150
6XL 156 140 158
Size